


Good according to (y)our standards

by Marvelgeek42



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: 5+1 Things, Agender Phil Coulson, Asexual Tony Stark, Bigender Loki, Bisexual Bucky Barnes, Bisexual Fandral, Bisexual Peggy Carter, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Demisexual Natasha Romanov, F/F, F/M, Gay Rhodey, Gen, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Intersex Loki, LGBTQ Characters, LGBTQ Themes, Lesbian Maria Hill, M/M, Multi, Pansexual Darcy Lewis, Pansexual Thor Odinson, Pride Parade, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-21
Updated: 2016-02-21
Packaged: 2018-05-22 11:40:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6078015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marvelgeek42/pseuds/Marvelgeek42
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five times an Avenger found out Tony was asexual and the one time they did something to help him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good according to (y)our standards

**Author's Note:**

  * For [IchigoRenji](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IchigoRenji/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Letters from a Genius: The Truth Shall Set You Free](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5537807) by [IchigoRenji](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IchigoRenji/pseuds/IchigoRenji). 



> You should read the above first.
> 
> This was supposed to simply be the Avengers finding out about Tony being asexual, nothing more. But then everyone demanded attention and dragged the NYC Pride Parade along for the ride.
> 
> Disclaimer: If I owned the Avengers, Steve would officially be bisexual.

_Cap got a funny look on his face. I guess he didn’t really know what Asexual meant...which doesn’t surprise me. It wasn’t a thing back from where he’s from_

* * *

It was four thirty in the morning of October 12, 2015 and Steve was just about to head out for his daily morning run when he saw a single piece of paper lying on the kitchen table. Just as soon as he realized it was a letter written in English (which he found out without reading a single word of the letter, as both the Old Norse Runes Thor used and Russian were pretty easy to differentiate from English), he knew the letter was left there intentionally.

Thor would have written in Runes (also he wasn't even on Earth right now), Bruce was too organized to leave something behind here, Clint and Natasha were to paranoid to do this and Tony (who the letter was from as it was his handwriting) had his bots and JARVIS to remember him to take the letter with him.

So Steve took the letter and started to read it. He wasn't even past the first paragraph when he had to stop for a moment. Coming out? They all knew the was either bi or pan, so why exactly was this one of the hardest things he had to say? Stark did not really care about what _anyone_ thought of him, so why didn't the genius trust himself to say it?

That Tony wasn't gay however did not surprise him at all. He had been involved with Pepper after all. He might have picked one night stands to fool the masses, but he would never have done that to Pepper.

Then the super soldier was again confused by the mention of the color purple. What did wearing purple have to do with anything?

It was obvious to anyone that Tony was different, so it was clear Tony himself knew it too. That he had started hiding behind a mask, a persona at such a young age seemed unthinkable and could not possibly be good for Tony's mental health. Feeling the need to hide oneself… Steve knew that emotion well. When he was younger, back in the late thirties, after starting puberty, he had thought of himself as a freak of nature. It seemed reasonable at that time, after all he liked both sexes. Bucky and him had been something not precisely boyfriends, but not simply friends either. Kind of like him and Peggy (and he suspected Peggy and Bucky too).

Tony not thinking of sex somehow seemed both completely wrong and strangely plausible. Not something he would ever have thought of; he would most certainly have laughed had someone other than Tony suggested it. But, somehow, it made a disturbing amount of sense.

The book (whatever book it was) had _saved his life?!_ Why would Tony's life need saving (or at least the kid of saving that a book can archive)? Steve nearly ripped the letter apart in worry when Tony described how he had felt. Not the purposeful kind of ripping, more the holding the edges/sides of the letter so hard the paper couldn't take it. His teammate had felt this desperate and not one of them noticed. Not him as team leader (and the serum also made him noticed more details), not the spies and not the other genius. Only Thor had an excuse with him being on Asgard the majority of the time. That made him wonder if there might be more things they missed.

Steve had to agree with Tony's point of today's society (and who was he kidding, in his time too, they had just been less obvious) being over-sexualized. He had always accepted this as a fact of life, but if people who did not like sex existed (which they obviously did, because Tony would not make jokes like this), it was _wrong_. It would only make more young children feel like Tony did. And some of them might not find out they weren't broken, that they were worth _so much_ in time. Steve promised himself to do something about it, no matter how small.

* * *

_Nat read it next, and almost didn’t believe it. She did my psych profile though, so I can understand where she’s coming from. She’d only ever seen my mask_

* * *

When Natasha went into the kitchen around five in the morning to make herself a cup of coffee, she was surprised to find Steve just getting ready to leave for his morning run. Normally he would already be halfway around Central Park by this time.

“Morning Steve. What's eating you?”

Natasha wasn't blind. She had been raised to take note of the smallest things, so she noticed both Steve's distress and his flinch when she had spoken, as he had been too distracted to notice her.

He took a sheet of paper out of his pocket and handed it to her.

“Here. It's from Tony. You should read it.”

“What has the idiot done now?”

Instead of answering, Steve struggled for a few seconds, before repeating his last statement and leaving. Pretty odd that.

So Natasha opened the letter Steve had given her.

It was filled three-quarters by Stark's messy scrawl, only is was way smaller than she expected after seeing him sign contracts and his reports too took more paper than they necessarily needed. It had to be something Stark was ashamed or afraid of. A failed lab experiment or something along those lines. The start of the letter fit the theory too.

Until he mentioned wearing purple. She had no clue what he meant by that, what purple represented for him, but if he was willing to wear it, then it was neither shame nor fear which made the size of his handwriting shrink drastically.

The Russian did not believe the letter when it claimed Stark had created a mask that young. Impossible. She would have seen through it. No one was that good, apart from the one who had trained her and the other girls. The Winter Soldier.

Stark not thinking of sex? Yeah, right. As if. The guy was the most sex-obsessed man she had ever seen, and she had seen her fair share of sex-addicted men. He had taken dozens, if not hundreds of people both female and male, into a/his bedroom over the years. Sunset Bain, Tiberius Stone, Christine Everhart, to name just a few who sprung into her mind. Not to forget those that were only rumors! Rhodes, Hogan, Pepper, even Phil (though she seriously doubted that one)!

Just as ridiculous seemed the idea of the man being suicidal. He had everything he wanted! Fame, money, attention. He clearly was no family man, so what did the self proclaimed genius lack that he could not pay someone to get him?

But… loneliness. It would explain more than it seemed at the first glance. Why Stark never looked truly happy (maybe it wasn't because they were in his home), why he, Banner and later Clint became friends so fast (people of the same kind do tend to stick together), why he treated his bots and JARVIS like they were humans when they weren't (and everyone but her had picked up on it. Morons).

There were books discussing this kind of topic? Sex not being required for a healthy and good relationship? Because Natasha has had sex many times, but love was not what she felt. She had not felt true love since her parents, Dimitri and Anastasia had died in 1945. The things she felt for Phil and Clint (and those two were different things) might come close, but in the end the Red Room had robbed her of the ability to feel true love or sexual desire. If there were books, she needed to look into them.

It were the last three paragraphs who made her believe the letter. Not wanting to be treated different from before sounded both like Tony and like someone coming out of the closet. And the thing with calling the theme of this letter mushy might have something to do with it too.

* * *

_Brucie-bear understood it fine_

* * *

Around five fifty Brue entered the kitchen of the communal level with the intent to make himself a nice cup of tea.

He dismissed his plan when Agent Romanoff silently shoved something in his chest, while leaving the room with a look of determination.

Once he was alone, he looked at the thing she had given him. It was a letter from Tony. Why did Agent Romanoff have this?

“JARVIS, am I meant to read this letter or is it against Tony's wishes?”

Unlike just about everyone else on this planet (not counting Happy Hogan and Rhodey), he respected his friend's privacy.

“It is Sir's intent for all the Avengers to read this letter. Both Captain Rogers and Agent Romanoff have already read it. I have to thank you for asking though. Only on Sir's behalf of course.”

“No problem, JARVIS, no problem at all”, Bruce smiled, knowing the AI did not mean all of the last sentence.

After Bruce read the first sentence, he returned to his original plan of making tea. He would need it.

When he returned to reading the letter a few minutes later, he knew what it was about just as soon as Tony's intention of wearing purple was mentioned. Bruce was introduced to the LGBT+ community by Betty whose sister (who she was very close to) had been assigned male at birth. The General of course did not accept her, even going as far as to disinherit her.

Tony was asexual, which did not surprise him as much as he thought it would. It seemed plausible. And it not only explained why Tony had ended his relationship with Pepper, but why he had not had a single one night stand in the entire time that had passed since then.

The doctor knew that Tony had at some point created a mask to hide his true self (Bruce thought he might have seen a few glances of the man's true self while they worked together in Tony's - or his - lab. Some actual smiles, some remarks and gestures the man would not have done in public), but he wouldn't have dreamed the billionaire had been as young as eight when he did it. He'd have guessed it was during his friend's teenage years or early twenties.

Bruce felt guilty that he had missed how his friend had shared his feelings of being broken. Worthless. The philanthropist had done everything in his power and then some to stop him from feeling like this and he had not even realized Tony still felt like this. He had recognized the look Tony had given him when he had mentioned his attempt. The look of someone who _tried before_. But Bruce had thought it had been after Afghanistan, after the man had realized what he (and to way larger parts Stane) had done. Dismissed it, believing it was over and done with. Yes, Bruce felt like a horrible friend.

How thankful he was, when Tony mentioned how he had read the book JARVIS had discovered and realized he was perfectly fine the way he was.

“Thank you for saving him, JARVIS.”

“I could not imagine doing anything different.”

Tony was right when he said that sex was not even close to as important for relationships as society claimed. He knew that from his experience with Betty. The only thing they missed was the possibility of children. And they could adopt or use other methods should they ever decide that they wanted to be parents.

It was good that Tony felt relieved, like the Other Guy had been taken from his shoulders. Tony deserved so much more than he seemed to believe.

 _Nothing will change. Of course you're still my friend_ , Bruce thought to himself as he went to look for Clint.

* * *

_Legolas might tease me for a while_

* * *

“Yo, Bruce!” Clint yelled from the ceiling of the underground archery range, where he was currently hanging in batlike fashion. He quickly shot the arrow he had been aiming, before climbing down.

“What's up?”

“We've been terrible friends for Tony,” the other man said, handing him a letter once the archer was in reach.

“What? Why?”

“Just… just read this okay? You'll understand,” Bruce promised. Then he left. Weird.

After what felt like ten minutes of staring at the letter in confusion, Clint opened the crumpled letter.

It seemed just like Tony to compliment himself while thanking someone. When it was mentioned that the billionaire had never before told someone the secret which would be revealed in this letter, Clint felt a wave of guilt. Why was odd considering that a) he was a spy. It was kind of his job to invade the privacy of others and b) he had Tony's permission. He knew this, because it was Bruce who gave him the letter. And yet, he still felt guilty.

National Coming Out Day? Stark was gay? Could that be the reason he and Pepper had broken up? Because he had realized this?

Okay, not gay. Which sexual orientation was represented by purple? Clint didn't know.

Oh yeah, Tony was different from others. He was smart and not afraid to criticize anyone or do something because someone might hate him for it (closing down the weapons manufacturing was an example that sprung to his mind).

Tony truly seemed to be Stark Senior's 'mini-me'. They had the same attitude was one thing the letter omitted.

He was asexual? The genius was so in for some teasing! Overcompensating would explain the numerous one night stands he had prior to _The_ _C_ _ave Incident_.

It did not surprise Clint at all that Tony considered JARVIS his dearest friend. Rhodey was the only human who was even in the race and it was obvious to anyone who had seen Tony interact with both of them who won.

Tony had been suicidal?! That explained Bruce's reaction for sure! The archer sat down on the floor. Tony had been suicidal and he had not noticed. The man simply had to hate him! They hung out a lot and he had not for a second suspected the man was depressed. Clint vowed to himself that from this point on, he would pay more attention to all of his friends. Who knew if anyone else might feel this way? They all kind of had reasons to!

He also needed to write a thank you letter to the author of the mentioned book. They deserved to know that they had saved the life of someone, even though he of course would type the letter, only sign with his initials and never mention Tony by name. Coulson had not liked it when Clint had outed nem as agender, so he doubted Tony would appreciate it. Especially since he didn't even have the courage to tell them.

He was looking forward to Tony's real personality. As he said that the things that made Tony Tony were real, the spy had no doubt that the rest would be just as awesome.

He hoped Tony would one day find someone to love him for who he was, not for his money, not for his genius and did not simply want to get in his pants. Because the guy had suffered so much in his life that is only seemed fair that he would find someone nice, get together, maybe even get married, should they want to, and _be happy_. Tony deserved it and Clint was sure he would find several people who agreed.

Apart from some harmless, well meant jokes (which would only last for a while) nothing would change - for him at least. Tony deserved to feel free like a bird for once in his lifetime after all.

* * *

_and I haven’t a clue what Thor will say_

* * *

Thor found out several weeks later than the rest of the Avengers, as he had been on Asgard with his Lady Jane during the majority of the year to help her settle in after he had proposed (and this only with the help of Friend Stark and Lady Darcy).

When they returned to Midgard in mid November for her mother's anniversary of her day of birth, Thor stopped by the Avengers Tower to reconnect with his fellow Avengers.

What he found puzzled him to a certain extend. He entered the living room where his teammates were assembled, but once they had exchanged greetings had gotten to the point of informing each other what they missed, things grew awkward. They left the room one by one, except for the archer that is.

“Friend Barton? Have I done something wrong? I do not understand.”

“There's something you need to know buddy. Can you read English by now?”

Thor nodded wondering what the question had to do with anything.

“Here,” the other man handed him a piece of paper, “Read this. JARVIS will answer questions you will most likely have. I'll be going too.”

Thus, Thor was left alone in his confusion. He decided to open the thing Friend Barton had given him. It turned out to be a letter from the Man of Iron.

Unlike the other Avengers Thor was confused by the concept of the so-called National Coming Out Day. What was the reason to make a whole day dedicated simply to leaving the house?

JARVIS once again proved to be a great help for the Asgardian. So it was a day for admitting oneself wasn't what was considered normal in terms of gender or sexuality. Asgard would have the need for something like this too. If one did like the same sex or was not the gender they were born with, they mostly kept quiet, as it was unheard of anyone but Sif being accepted for it. And even in her case most of the older generation only did it barely because he as the prince did.

It would be good, were Asgard even as accepting as Midgard, for Thor's emotions and desires were not limited to one gender. To him it seemed silly to reduce one's chances of finding the one (or occasionally two) soul(s) the Norns had created to be with them. Fandral had agreed with him and there had been a time where the two of them experimented.

Thor returned to the letter detailing the hardships of the Man of Iron. Friend Tony was a brave soul indeed. Not many who had suffered so much still fought to save the world. Most snapped and one just needed to look at Loki to see the results. He had been impregnated several times and in addition with his magic this meant almost no one would let themselves be seen with him.

Thor knew that Friend Stark was often compared to his father and did not particularly like this. Maybe this was because it reminded him of the emotional pain he had to go through because of what everyone expected of him in addition to the fact his father did not seem to have been a good one. No one could possibly enjoy having to fake their personality from such a young age (it seemed to be young and JARVIS confirmed it was).

Thor was beyond horrified one he realized that Friend Tony had too at one point considered to end his life. It was bad enough that his brother and Friend Banner tried. He did not need to know how he had failed more people.

The prince of Asgard had never before heard the term asexual, but Friend Tony explained its meaning rather well. It was perplexing for him, but Thor did not think the Man of Iron (or anyone else) would lie about such matters.

Thor would do his best to ensure that no more (or at the very least less) people would feel the need to hide who they were.

* * *

On June 25 2016, the day of this year's New York Pride Parade the Avengers and a few of their friends were assembling in the lobby of the Tower to join the festivities (it had been Steve's idea and no one had really been against it).

Tony had been debating between wearing a purple tee and a baseball tee with “MY SEXUAL PREFERENCE IS NOPE” written on it. Once Clint had heard of it, he had declared that everyone should wear shirts with slogans on them. Rosabel immediately mentioned her “YES I'M ASEXUAL. NO I'M NOT WAITING FOR THE RIGHT PERSON” tank top, so it had been decided (also Tony thought his girlfriend looked stunning in it - but she did this no matter what she wore).

Steve was wearing a shirt that said “BI PRIDE” over the appropriate Pride flag (not the “ALL MY FRIENDS ARE DEAD” tee Clint had brought him much to the archers dismay).

Bruce found a shirt that said “I AM” then several sexualities and gender identities in strikethrough and finally “A PERSON”. Naturally, Tony adored it.

Betty had ordered a tee saying “MISOGYNY CAUSES ME TO BREAK OUT IN FEMINIST RANTS”, while her sister Jasmine wore one with the slogan “ALL I WANT TO DO IS EAT PIZZA, PET CATS AND END TRANS ERASURE”.

Phil had almost been forced to wear a shirt saying “TOO CUTE FOR A GENDER IDENTITY”, but Tony had somehow produced a hoodie saying “NON BINARY BADASS” in the literal last second, so ne was wearing this on top of the other one and thanking JARVIS for ordering it (Tony pouted, Rosabel laughed).

Darcy was wearing a baseball tee claiming that “THE CAKE IS A LIE”. Tony and Rosabel were the first ones to get it. The aces were often found saying that they had cake instead of sex, so Darcy as a pansexual simply had to wear her Portal shirt.

She had also equipped Thor with one declaring “PAN CAKE PRIDE” and Jane with one that had “EQUALITY IS NOT A SIN” written on it (maybe Tony was just imagining it, but it seemed a little tighter than it should be).

Maria Hill had surprised all of them by showing up wearing a “NO ONE KNOWS I'M A LESBIAN” hoodie and promptly kissing Darcy, followed by Rhodey in one with “USA GAY PRIDE”.

Clint was wearing something that informed everyone that “THIS IS MY PHOTO BOMB SHIRT” and Natasha ended up having “WAKE ME UP WHEN WE NO LONGER LIVE IN A HETERONORMATIVE SOCIETY” written across her chest.

Somewhere down the line - not even JARVIS knew how or when it happened - Loki (in female form), Fandral and Sif had joined them. Now they were wearing shirts saying “I GOT 99 PROBLEMS AND SOCIETY'S ATTITUDE TOWARDS SEXUAL ORIENTATION & GENDER IDENTITY COVERS LIKE 98 OF THEM”, “YES I'M BISEXUAL. NO I'M NOT GOING TO PICK A SIDE” and “THIS SHIRT IS AN OBJECT, I AM NOT”. It was truly beautiful.

Once they had assembled they took of towards the Pride Parade. Some of them, like Darcy, were already tipsy while others, like Rosabel, had not yet touched a single glass.

During the course of the day Jasmine finally found the courage to kiss Phil (something ne was happy about), Rhodey had gotten Fandral a cellphone (from Tony's money) just so they could keep in contact and Maria and Darcy had disappeared to God knows where.

Clint and Natasha stayed with Rosabel and Tony for the most time, but around four pm they made eye contact before Natasha nodded and they too were gone.

Thor and Jane (by now married) used this opportunity to announce that they were expecting little ones, so they spent the majority of the day saying thank you.

Bruce and Betty were trying to get as much information on how to help their friends and family and somehow ended up doing a press conference type thing explaining that yes, there were queer Avengers, no, it was not them and yes, it was their friends own business to decide who knew.

Steve, Loki and Sif somehow got roped into spending the day with a group of teenagers who loved the fact that some of their idols were like them and proud of it.

**Author's Note:**

> The shirts are real you can find them [here](https://www.lookhuman.com). I am in no way associated with them.


End file.
